Krokodil Hunters Blame Flesh Eating Horse for Drug War Miseries

Steve Irwin was killed by a sting ray. Not a crocodile.

Steve Irwin was killed by a sting ray. Not a crocodile.

Krokodil, the prohibition-era (i.e. present day) moonshine version of desomorphine (dihydrodesoxymorphine, trade name Permonid) that, according to legend, was previously made strictly for self-use in the kitchens of suicidal Siberian smack addicts, took almost a decade to make it to Moscow (supposedly), and has finally made it to America (maybe). That is, if you can believe the hysterical American media, eager as ever to find an easy monster to frighten-for-cash those millions of gullible saps, all at the expense of a few seriously ill junkies. That’s also if you can disbelieve the DEA, which you already do, unless you’re unfamiliar with their interdiction statistics. DEA says krokodil’s existence in the U.S. is unconfirmed, despite all the hysterical reportage and ridiculous YouTube videos. The media has responded with total confusion, since they don’t quite comprehend that the DEA doesn’t exist to protect anyone’s health and also doesn’t like looking stupid, which the media doesn’t seem to mind.

In Illinois, a few hospitalized users who media are claiming were riding the Russian crocodile say they thought they were buying heroin, and unlike heroin, this stuff made them really sick. DEA is right that it could just be contaminated horse, which, while safe as houses when properly manufactured in a lab, isn’t so safe when it’s made in a hut by prohibition-era (i.e. present day) gangsters and sold by unscrupulous capitalists who cut it down further with whatever’s at hand in the kitchen.

Now, let’s say it was krokodil. Who would put such garbage into their body? Ask the fat idiot next to you at McDonald’s. Then take, for example, a Russian girl in Siberia who bought a bunch of codeine pills at the grocery store and then pretended she was a professional chemist with a pharmaceutical lab instead of a low paid laborer with a dirty kitchen. To her, making krokodil is an act of desperation in the face of poverty and Prohibition. Because if she had access to a decent maintenance program or a supply of safe opiates, I find it very hard to believe she’d make toxic moonshine and inject it into her vein. Sure, the sane thing she could have done was to have used cold water filtration on the codeine to rid it of harmful paracetamol (Tylenol) and just take a substantial dose of codeine to relieve her withdrawal and misery. So, if she really thought the simplicity of a pitcher of cold water wasn’t an option and proceeded directly to advanced kitchen chemistry, then she must have a serious habit, and be in serious need of help—which probably still hasn’t turned up, even if she’s since been hospitalized and photographed for the cover of the local newspaper and is now despised as a krokodil freak.

It’s really the same old story, and America could teach the world a thing or two about the subject if it would bother to learn the lesson itself. Alcohol prohibition in the U.S. led to poisoning, blindness, death, murder and gang wars, just to name a few of its side effects. The government just has a slight problem admitting wrongdoing. Bad habit. It’s currently in denial.

You’d expect the media, at least, to realize that there’s something here a lot more frightening than the drugs themselves; that is, the actual cause of these miseries. They probably do. It’s just that the truth doesn’t sell advertising packages. So don’t count on the media, or anyone else trying to make money in the process, to tell you that the War on Drugs is the real monster. Just be frightened. Because flesh-eating crocodile and contaminated horse pales in comparison.

Child Riding the Krokodil

Child on Crocodile

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